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Thursday, November 4, 2010

Nerf Review! (Warning:If you already think I'm a dork, don't read this post.)

I have discovered something that may change the way I view Nerf guns forever. I will begin with a statistical breakdown and five-star review(the stars look like this: *****) of the guns I own. Those that have been modified will be rated pre- and post-modification.

N-Strike Switch Shot
* (pre-mod rating)
**** (post-mod rating)
Price: $25/with Wii game (clearance)

N-Strike Nite-Finder
** (pre-mod rating)
**** (post-mod rating)
Price: $5 (on sale), $9 (I own two)

N-Strike Recon
*** (pre-mod rating)
***(post-mod rating... the mod only added about three feet to my firing range)
Price: $25

N-Strike Maverick
** (if it didn't jam so frequently, I'd give it an extra star)
Price: $10

N-Strike Deploy
Price: $20

N-Strike Raider
Price $35

N-Strike Stampede
Price: $50

Now, those of you keeping track will note that I have spent nearly $180 on Nerf guns (I did not include those air-powered dart guns made by other, less quality-conscious companies, otherwise I'd be pushing $200). Some of these guns were unsatisfactory, so I was forced to open them up, remove and rearrange their guts, and put them back together.

A couple of weeks ago I was tinkering in my garage trying to build my own dart gun from PVC pipes and extra bits of things that I keep on hand for whenever I'm feeling inventive. I was testing a length of pipe to see just how feasible it was as a barrel. I stuck a dart into the end of the barrel and puffed hard on one end. The result was such a forceful expulsion of the suction dart that I was left speechless for several seconds. All I could do was run inside to show my wife, who didn't care. My little 30-inch pipe is far more accurate and far more powerful than any of my other, far more expensive dart-guns.

To all of you skeptics I say this: "Try it, sucka'!"

I've also discovered that by wrapping the shaft of the darts with Scotch tape, you get less friction down the chamber, as well as added rigidity, which means better accuracy. That is all.

Thank you,
      Matt Beers


  1. I feel like I am the only one who will be commenting on your blog. I love the Nerf Raider, with its drum of darts that seems endless (except for when you have to reload). I am slightly disappointed to see that you don't have the Nerf Vulcan, but I assure you that it's worth it only if you get it on sale. I purchased mine on Black Friday last year and got it for $20. Yes, I got up at 4am to fight crowds for a nerf gun. We should plan a nerf war sometime and I will make a special trip to Ft. Wayne for it.

  2. My very good friend, Eric, has the Vulcan and it is VERY cool. The Stampede is along the same line, being battery-powered, but as it uses a clip, it's much easier to reload.

  3. So, Are you saying that if I buy my husband the Vulcan for Christmas it would be a **** gift? or a ***** gift? And how much should I pay for such a gift?

  4. I would give the Vulcan 5 and the Alpha Trooper both 5 stars. I'm also a big fan of the Stampede.

  5. Anonymous, prior to my discovery of the blow-gun method of abusing my children with foam darts, I would have said, without hesitation, that the Vulcan and the Stampede were 5-star Nerf guns. But at $45-$50 dollars apiece, one has to take much into consideration. That's the responsible answer.

    The Matt Beers answer is this: Yes. Buy your husband a Vulcan. And buy him lots and lots of extra darts and D-cell batteries. He'll feel bad about only getting you a diamond necklace.