Revelations of St. Matrick

Today is St. Matty's day. Bringeth it on, my children. I've the daycare kids here 'til 4:30, then small group from 6:30 to 8:30, then nothin' but tasty beverages 'til bedtime!

Note: By "tasty beverages" I mean five ice cubes in a plastic cup followed by just enough Irish Creme to cover the bottom two-thirds of the ice, then milk to the top. I will drink only one. My mom, who weighs about 90lbs, makes fun of me for drinking like a little girl.



So, today, in celebration of how totally rad I am, I have decided to share a few of my more recent ideas which are sure to bring me fortune and fame.

1. The Poopless Baby- It's self-explanatory, really. It's a baby that doesn't poop. Everybody'll want one. Or two. We could package them together like multiple births, then TLC will have no shortage of reality shows.

2. Actually, the Poopless Baby was my only idea.

Thank you,
Matt Beers