It's a small world, which makes it that much easier to blow up.

I am a total stat junkie. You know the section of the newspaper where they print the Harper's research stuff? I love it. It's my favorite part of the newspaper... although, I haven't seen it in there for a while, so they may have stopped running that feature. Maybe I should write a letter...

Blogger has some awesome stats for those of us with our own blogs (stats which they occasionally change for no apparent reason, but whatever...) and one of my favorites is the "Audience" stat. It tells me how many page views come from each country, what operating system they use, what browser they use, and there's even a tiny, unlabeled map so you can see what planet you're on. The map isn't really all that helpful, to be honest.

Here's a rundown of the current top ten nations to view The 200lb Man (since Blogger started keeping track, sometime last summer, I think).

6,847          United States

208             Russia

178             Canada

174             Serbia

159             Netherlands

134             United Kingdom

98               Germany

87               Australia

62               Latvia

40               South Korea

Of course, the U.S. is at the top. Apart from being my home country, they'll typically do whatever they're told. "Hey, Americans! Pay tons and tons of money for gas! Hey, Americans! Bomb this country! Hey, Americans! Watch Twilight!" It actually works to my advantage, so I shouldn't complain.

I was surprised to see Russia in the number two spot. But then I remembered my eye-opening Dr. Seuss expose'. It's obvious to me that I've struck a chord with the KGB and am now under observation. Thanks for the page views, all the same.

Canada, at number three, is always welcome to the party. Unfortunately, I don't have anything to say about Canada that isn't either based on ridiculous stereotypes that I picked up from watching Strange Brew repeatedly when I was in high school or just plain fabricated.

And WAYYYY down in the number four spot is... Serbia. WTF, guys?! I spent sixteen days in your lovely country, being treated to the finest hospitality I have ever known, sharing my impeccable English with you, and trying not to scar my backside with your extremely abrasive toilet paper, and this is how you repay me? Number four? I'm gonna go cry a bit, now. Be right back.

The Netherlands (which I initially confused with the nether regions, sorry) is the fifth most frequent visitor to my blog. I'm sorry Netherlands. I wish I knew more about you. You're in Europe-ish, right? And your people are not, I'm fairly certain, known as "Nethers." Not as often as Americans are, anyway. Well, thanks for visiting.

Spots six through ten are filled by the U.K., Germany ("Sie haben meine Unterhosen gestohlen!"... Two years of German in high school and that's about as much as I can remember...), Australia, Latvia, and South Korea. Thanks, guys. Let's make a bit more of an effort, though, huh?

Thanks, from the bottom of my shallow, cheese-filled American heart, for visiting my blog. I really do appreciate it.

Thank you,

      Matt Beers