I'd like to start this post by announcing that I do NOT have 200 lb balls. According to my blog stats, someone did a Google search regarding such a thing and it led them here. Allow me to lay those rumors to rest right now. My balls are mostly average.
Moving on...
Since we moved into this house
GRR! My wife just walked into the room, turned my music down so low that I can't hear it, and then left the room. Drives me nuts...
Since we moved into this house I've gone from an embarrassing 225 lbs to a slightly less embarrassing 215 lbs. I attribute my weight-loss success to a strict regimen of cherry cola and Halloween candy.
About six weeks ago my wife bought 1,800 rolls of the cheapest toilet paper in the world. She has admitted her error but makes ridiculous statements like, "Well, we can't just throw it away," and "Just double it up." Oh, good. So more of a bad thing suddenly becomes a good thing. Continuing to use this product is like hearing from your doctor that you have lung cancer, but you've still got an entire carton of cigarettes left and it would be wasteful to throw them out, so...
Right now I'm reading the autobiography Girls Can't Be Pilots by Margaret Ringenberg. So far I think she might be wrong because she was a pilot and a girl. Actually, Mrs. Ringenberg was the grandmother of my childhood best friend, Joe Wright. I even had the chance to ride in her plane as part of Joe's eighth birthday celebration. I was sick for two weeks following, but I doubt it was the pilot's fault.
I must go now because it's been three weeks and we still haven't managed to get our van in the garage. It has been strongly implied that this is my fault.
Thank you,
Matt Beers
Showing posts with label Random Thoughts. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Random Thoughts. Show all posts
Saturday, October 29, 2011
Monday, October 24, 2011
One man's trash is more often than not actual trash.
Brew Hampshire is our third house. It's also our oldest. Our first house was only fifteen years old when we bought it. We lived there for three years. Our second house was brand new. We lived there for seven years. Brew Hampshire is forty-three years old. I hope to be buried in the backyard, hopefully not by accident.
When you buy an older house you discover all sorts of interesting things. For example, you might discover, like I did, stacks and stacks of unused U.S. Postal Service boxes in a basement storage room. Or you might discover roughly one (1) nautical mile of coaxial cable running through the walls of your new home. (If anyone knows of a coaxial resale business, please give me their number.) The discovering seems to go on forever.
Random odds and ends left on window sills, high closet shelves, buried beneath a swing-set... When you buy an older home, you learn a lot more about people than you do about buildings. You learn that at some point in the past, someone painted over a lot of rotten exterior wood and then moved. You learn that a previous owner had heard of, but had never seen, a workbench when they decided to build the one that is falling over in your garage. You learn that paint will only hide the water damage in your bedroom ceiling long enough for the house to sell. The adventures never end.
Betsy and I have no intention of moving away anytime soon, so any repairs we make will be done properly... by other people who know what they're doing. We will have the boiler inspected regularly, the chimney cleaned yearly, the yard mowed bi-annually, and the leaves raked whenever the neighbors complain.
I've already replaced one light and hung a chandelier over the dining room table. We've had the locks re-keyed (one of them fell apart the first time we used it... the locksmith is on his way over right now to fix it) and the gutters should be repaired sometime next week. I've added a swing-set to the backyard (for a grand-total of three rickety play-structures) and removed a fountain that was a safety issue for the daycare kids.
The discovering goes on. What wasn't done right in the past, how far we're willing to go to do the job right, what was important enough to buy, but was nevertheless left behind...
I haven't even been in the attic yet.
Thank you,
Matt Beers
When you buy an older house you discover all sorts of interesting things. For example, you might discover, like I did, stacks and stacks of unused U.S. Postal Service boxes in a basement storage room. Or you might discover roughly one (1) nautical mile of coaxial cable running through the walls of your new home. (If anyone knows of a coaxial resale business, please give me their number.) The discovering seems to go on forever.
Random odds and ends left on window sills, high closet shelves, buried beneath a swing-set... When you buy an older home, you learn a lot more about people than you do about buildings. You learn that at some point in the past, someone painted over a lot of rotten exterior wood and then moved. You learn that a previous owner had heard of, but had never seen, a workbench when they decided to build the one that is falling over in your garage. You learn that paint will only hide the water damage in your bedroom ceiling long enough for the house to sell. The adventures never end.
Betsy and I have no intention of moving away anytime soon, so any repairs we make will be done properly... by other people who know what they're doing. We will have the boiler inspected regularly, the chimney cleaned yearly, the yard mowed bi-annually, and the leaves raked whenever the neighbors complain.
I've already replaced one light and hung a chandelier over the dining room table. We've had the locks re-keyed (one of them fell apart the first time we used it... the locksmith is on his way over right now to fix it) and the gutters should be repaired sometime next week. I've added a swing-set to the backyard (for a grand-total of three rickety play-structures) and removed a fountain that was a safety issue for the daycare kids.
The discovering goes on. What wasn't done right in the past, how far we're willing to go to do the job right, what was important enough to buy, but was nevertheless left behind...
I haven't even been in the attic yet.
Thank you,
Matt Beers
Sunday, October 23, 2011
Welcome to Brew Hampshire! (that's what I call our new house)
Welp, here we are.
I'm sitting in our new house, in a large chair in our family room, laptop on top of my lap. Sunlight is cutting sharply through the autumn leaves (of which there are still many clinging stubbornly to the trees) and splashing all over the floor. Oh, wait. Cloud. AH! Cloud moved. Sun's back.
Betsy is gone for the weekend. Scrapbooking retreat. Macy is prancing around town with Grandma. Jack is lost in some drawings he's doing. Zoe is marching around the house with a bowl full of Cheerios making improbable demands from inanimate objects.
This is very nice.
Our new home is pretty awesome. It's very large and very full of personality. Like me. We have a separate area for the daycare so at the end of the day we don't feel like we're still at the office, we have an immense backyard full of trees that is perfect for exploring and playing (complete with our own creek), a full basement ("full" meaning "full of bigscreens and couches"), and a garage stacked high with cardboard boxes that we haven't bothered to empty yet (on the one hand, it's only been two weeks, but on the other hand, we've had two whole weeks... look at it however you choose).
The thing about houses with personality... they usually have quirks, too. Sometimes quirks can be fun, like the old carriage-style light hanging over the breakfast nook or the decades-old textured wallpaper in the basement stairwell or the laundry chute that provided Jack and Macy with hours of thrilling enjoyment when they first discovered it. But, quirks can also be not-so-fun, like the gutters that are trying to jump off of my roof or the fruit flies that have apparently made our house National Fruit Fly Headquarters. But we're prepared to deal with quirks. For example, we had an issue with our front door. Well, issue might not be... Betsy couldn't open it. One phone call and one signed check later and our front door opens smoothly and all of the door to our house are re-keyed and we have a half-dozen shiny new keys to put in a drawer somewhere and never, ever use.
The biggest hiccup by far has been the gutters. Having so many trees, our gutters fill up pretty quickly with leaves and then get clogged and then overflow. At one particular point, the overflow was flooding a small section of our landscaping, but water being what it is and finding ways to drain and whatnot, the overflow seeped into our basement, right into Betsy's craft room.
We called some people. We're getting quotes. It's all good.
Two weeks. I've got my books shelved, but my clothes are still in a pile in the bedroom. The TVs are all set up in the basement, but we still can't get the van in the garage. We're slowly but surely getting things in order. But my wife will be coming home in a few hours and my immediate concern is getting the house "Betsy-ready," so I must go.
Thank you.
Matt Beers
I'm sitting in our new house, in a large chair in our family room, laptop on top of my lap. Sunlight is cutting sharply through the autumn leaves (of which there are still many clinging stubbornly to the trees) and splashing all over the floor. Oh, wait. Cloud. AH! Cloud moved. Sun's back.
Betsy is gone for the weekend. Scrapbooking retreat. Macy is prancing around town with Grandma. Jack is lost in some drawings he's doing. Zoe is marching around the house with a bowl full of Cheerios making improbable demands from inanimate objects.
This is very nice.
Our new home is pretty awesome. It's very large and very full of personality. Like me. We have a separate area for the daycare so at the end of the day we don't feel like we're still at the office, we have an immense backyard full of trees that is perfect for exploring and playing (complete with our own creek), a full basement ("full" meaning "full of bigscreens and couches"), and a garage stacked high with cardboard boxes that we haven't bothered to empty yet (on the one hand, it's only been two weeks, but on the other hand, we've had two whole weeks... look at it however you choose).
The thing about houses with personality... they usually have quirks, too. Sometimes quirks can be fun, like the old carriage-style light hanging over the breakfast nook or the decades-old textured wallpaper in the basement stairwell or the laundry chute that provided Jack and Macy with hours of thrilling enjoyment when they first discovered it. But, quirks can also be not-so-fun, like the gutters that are trying to jump off of my roof or the fruit flies that have apparently made our house National Fruit Fly Headquarters. But we're prepared to deal with quirks. For example, we had an issue with our front door. Well, issue might not be... Betsy couldn't open it. One phone call and one signed check later and our front door opens smoothly and all of the door to our house are re-keyed and we have a half-dozen shiny new keys to put in a drawer somewhere and never, ever use.
The biggest hiccup by far has been the gutters. Having so many trees, our gutters fill up pretty quickly with leaves and then get clogged and then overflow. At one particular point, the overflow was flooding a small section of our landscaping, but water being what it is and finding ways to drain and whatnot, the overflow seeped into our basement, right into Betsy's craft room.
We called some people. We're getting quotes. It's all good.
Two weeks. I've got my books shelved, but my clothes are still in a pile in the bedroom. The TVs are all set up in the basement, but we still can't get the van in the garage. We're slowly but surely getting things in order. But my wife will be coming home in a few hours and my immediate concern is getting the house "Betsy-ready," so I must go.
Thank you.
Matt Beers
Wednesday, October 5, 2011
Stuff always make life harder. Except for Swiss Army knives. And personal robot assistants.
Two days. In two days, less, actually, we will be signing the closing papers that will put us in our new home. And when you think about all of the requirements that needed to be met, it's pretty amazing that we're moving at all. God has a way of giving you no options so you can sit back and see how limitless He is.
I know I've been doing this a lot lately, but I do want to apologize for not posting much. Selling and buying houses is pretty exhaustive work, when you figure in all of the repairs here and there and all of the packing and all of the paperwork and phone calls (neither of which are being handled by me). I'm quite literally beat. I'm standing here at two in the afternoon and I feel like I could sleep until tomorrow morning.
So, two days. That's pretty good news. We met the current owner of our future home and I think she's going through pretty much the same thing we are. Considering how amicable she was with some of the repairs we requested from her, she's just as eager to move as we are. But, to be perfectly honest, if she hadn't been so willing, I don't know what we would have done. Another sign of God's hand in all of this, I guess.
The kids' rooms are almost all packed up (except that Jack has already opened every box in his room and made a rather large mess) and Betsy's craft room (which used to be my library (which used to be our walk-in closet)) is packed up and has been re-converted into a walk-in closet. I have one window to replace (I'm still waiting for a call from Menard's that it has come in) and a lot of clothes to pack, but for the most part, we're ready to go. We still have daycare stuff out because we've still got kids coming until tomorrow evening, and we still have most of the kitchen to pack (a friend is coming by tomorrow to help with that), and I've got lots of little random bits floating around in the garage, but when you consider the personal belongings of five people and the monumental task of packing it all up, along with purchasing new appliances and getting everything ready for our daycare inspection at the new house, and then all of your regular life stuff on top of it all, you've got one incredibly long sentence. Cram that incredibly long sentence into three weeks and you'd be pretty tired, too. And I doubt you'd be very funny. Also, I'm sick.
Thank you,
Matt Beers
I know I've been doing this a lot lately, but I do want to apologize for not posting much. Selling and buying houses is pretty exhaustive work, when you figure in all of the repairs here and there and all of the packing and all of the paperwork and phone calls (neither of which are being handled by me). I'm quite literally beat. I'm standing here at two in the afternoon and I feel like I could sleep until tomorrow morning.
So, two days. That's pretty good news. We met the current owner of our future home and I think she's going through pretty much the same thing we are. Considering how amicable she was with some of the repairs we requested from her, she's just as eager to move as we are. But, to be perfectly honest, if she hadn't been so willing, I don't know what we would have done. Another sign of God's hand in all of this, I guess.
The kids' rooms are almost all packed up (except that Jack has already opened every box in his room and made a rather large mess) and Betsy's craft room (which used to be my library (which used to be our walk-in closet)) is packed up and has been re-converted into a walk-in closet. I have one window to replace (I'm still waiting for a call from Menard's that it has come in) and a lot of clothes to pack, but for the most part, we're ready to go. We still have daycare stuff out because we've still got kids coming until tomorrow evening, and we still have most of the kitchen to pack (a friend is coming by tomorrow to help with that), and I've got lots of little random bits floating around in the garage, but when you consider the personal belongings of five people and the monumental task of packing it all up, along with purchasing new appliances and getting everything ready for our daycare inspection at the new house, and then all of your regular life stuff on top of it all, you've got one incredibly long sentence. Cram that incredibly long sentence into three weeks and you'd be pretty tired, too. And I doubt you'd be very funny. Also, I'm sick.
Thank you,
Matt Beers
Thursday, September 15, 2011
And no, I don't know how to do any of those things.
Before I really begin I would like, first and foremost, to apologize to those of you who have arrived at this blog, this unutterably excellent blog, by mistake. My online statistics tell me that many of you were brought here while searching for information on receiving your PhD online (which I'm not sure is the best idea) or something of an equally shady nature.
Secondly, I would like to apologize for the recent and future lack of posts on this blog. Things hereabouts have been hectic to say the least. Also, I bought a new Nerf gun last week, so I've been pretty busy shooting the kids.
Our house sold, mostly. I say "mostly" because there is a stack of paperwork that needs to be signed before it's official. Those papers, God willing, will be signed on October 7. That's three weeks away. We've started packing and planning our redecorating attack (Betsy thinks we're gonna need new plates), but it isn't 100% OFFICIAL. So, our house is sold, mostly.
The house we're buying (mostly) is 43 years old. It sits on a half-acre wooded lot and even has its own creek. The back yard has a fence and tons of trees. There's a big driveway with a basketball hoop and lots of room for the kids to ride their bikes without having to go out into the street. It sits on a full basement and has a second set of stairs leading from the garage to the basement, for quick escapes, I guess. There are a few issues, but we're prepared to deal with them. All in all, the house has buckets of personality, which is not something we ever knew we wanted until we lived in a house with no personality.
I have some pretty big ideas about what I would like to do with our new house. I want to build a big tree house for the kids. I want to create a fancy covered area for a fire-pit (think of a lean-to with seats and a nice wooden floor and a brick-lined pit for the fire... a good place to sit in the rain with a pipe and two or three of your favorite Hobbits). I want to install a fountain-beverage dispenser in Betsy's craft room (that should be good for at least a year of nocturnal affection). And then I want to take a nap in the hammock I hope to string between two trees which have already been prepped for a hammock.
So, we've been pretty busy the last few weeks. And on top of it all, my computer has decided to live up to its price tag. I've been unenthusiastic about doing ANYthing on here because it's just too frustrating. Hopefully the problem will be resolved rather soon.
That's all.
Thank you,
Matt Beers
Secondly, I would like to apologize for the recent and future lack of posts on this blog. Things hereabouts have been hectic to say the least. Also, I bought a new Nerf gun last week, so I've been pretty busy shooting the kids.
Our house sold, mostly. I say "mostly" because there is a stack of paperwork that needs to be signed before it's official. Those papers, God willing, will be signed on October 7. That's three weeks away. We've started packing and planning our redecorating attack (Betsy thinks we're gonna need new plates), but it isn't 100% OFFICIAL. So, our house is sold, mostly.
The house we're buying (mostly) is 43 years old. It sits on a half-acre wooded lot and even has its own creek. The back yard has a fence and tons of trees. There's a big driveway with a basketball hoop and lots of room for the kids to ride their bikes without having to go out into the street. It sits on a full basement and has a second set of stairs leading from the garage to the basement, for quick escapes, I guess. There are a few issues, but we're prepared to deal with them. All in all, the house has buckets of personality, which is not something we ever knew we wanted until we lived in a house with no personality.
I have some pretty big ideas about what I would like to do with our new house. I want to build a big tree house for the kids. I want to create a fancy covered area for a fire-pit (think of a lean-to with seats and a nice wooden floor and a brick-lined pit for the fire... a good place to sit in the rain with a pipe and two or three of your favorite Hobbits). I want to install a fountain-beverage dispenser in Betsy's craft room (that should be good for at least a year of nocturnal affection). And then I want to take a nap in the hammock I hope to string between two trees which have already been prepped for a hammock.
So, we've been pretty busy the last few weeks. And on top of it all, my computer has decided to live up to its price tag. I've been unenthusiastic about doing ANYthing on here because it's just too frustrating. Hopefully the problem will be resolved rather soon.
That's all.
Thank you,
Matt Beers
Sunday, August 28, 2011
I used up all of my fancy words for something else.
Holy craparoni. I just said that. Sorry.
Our house has been on the market for about three months with no offers. We've had eleven showings and today we had our first open house. And there is a very real possibility that the open house has brought us a buyer! They want to come back and look at the house on Tuesday. At 10:00 in the morning. While we're doing our daycare thang. It'll be awesome.
In other news, I meet every Thursday night with a writing group. We mostly just sit around and make up excuses why we aren't writing anything. But this week, we have an assignment. It's kind complicated, so pay attention.
PART ONE (1): Write a short story approximately 1,000 words in length. Next, rewrite the story to exactly 100 words.
PART TWO (2): Write a something exactly 100 words in length and rewrite it to exactly 20 words.
I have accomplished part one of part one. I wrote a short story which came out to 1,774 words. I then spent two hours chopping it down to 1,199 words. Rewriting it to 100 words should succeed in causing my internal organs to explode.
And, as I'm spouting randomness due to an internal server error in my brain, I forgot to eat dinner. I'll see what I can do about fixing that. And Iron Man is a pretty awesome movie.
Thank you,
Matt Beers
Our house has been on the market for about three months with no offers. We've had eleven showings and today we had our first open house. And there is a very real possibility that the open house has brought us a buyer! They want to come back and look at the house on Tuesday. At 10:00 in the morning. While we're doing our daycare thang. It'll be awesome.
In other news, I meet every Thursday night with a writing group. We mostly just sit around and make up excuses why we aren't writing anything. But this week, we have an assignment. It's kind complicated, so pay attention.
PART ONE (1): Write a short story approximately 1,000 words in length. Next, rewrite the story to exactly 100 words.
PART TWO (2): Write a something exactly 100 words in length and rewrite it to exactly 20 words.
I have accomplished part one of part one. I wrote a short story which came out to 1,774 words. I then spent two hours chopping it down to 1,199 words. Rewriting it to 100 words should succeed in causing my internal organs to explode.
And, as I'm spouting randomness due to an internal server error in my brain, I forgot to eat dinner. I'll see what I can do about fixing that. And Iron Man is a pretty awesome movie.
Thank you,
Matt Beers
Wednesday, August 24, 2011
VHS must stand for "Very Highly Satisfying."
I stumbled upon a gold mine this evening. And I have my computer to thank for it. Allow me to extrapolate the details. I don't know what I just said. Well, that's never stopped me before...
My computer is a wretched lump of silicon and plastic... not unlike Joan Crawford (I don't really know much about Ms. Crawford, but I hear that she was awful, just awful,)... and at some point in the past few days iTunes made a request which inspired a crisis of confidence somewhere in my C-drive. My computer now has all the self-assurance of Bob Wiley and has therefore been tackling each task with baby-steps.
For more information on Bob Wiley and his many hilarious afflictions, watch this:
Yeah. That's pretty much what my computer has been doing the past day and a half.
I don't know boatloads about computers, but I do know a bit. A mega-bit! See? That was a computer joke.
I did some anti-virus stuff and some defragmentation and I deleted a few programs that were eating up valuable memory... pretty basic stuff. However, my computer has been very cautious and is going about these processes at essentially the speed of a Speak & Spell. So rather than settle down and do the work that I actually had hoped to do this evening, I found myself digging through a drawer of old VHS tapes from many, many years ago. The following is an incomplete list of the programming that I or my wife deemed worthy of recording...
several episodes of Space Ghost Coast To Coast,
one episode of Sealab 2021,
one episode of Perfect Strangers,
one episode of WWF Monday Night Raw,
VH1 Behind the Music: Sublime,
the final episode of Seinfeld,
a dozen episodes of The Simpsons,
the Beastie Boys' "Intergallactic" video (three times in a row),
several History Channel programs about experimental WWII aircraft,
commercials for Parker Lewis Can't Lose, Beverly Hills 90210, Lady Stetson perfume,
a Minute Maid commercial with Patrick Ewing spinning a can on his finger,
a Pepsi/Super Nintendo commercial starring Bo Jackson,
a cinematic trailer for Dutch, and the VHS release of Home Alone (a steal at just $24.98),
countless half-episodes of Mystery Science Theater 3000,
and much, much more!
Anyway, my computer has summoned enough courage to allow me these few minutes of blogging enjoyment, which I promptly squandered.
Thank you,
Matt Beers
My computer is a wretched lump of silicon and plastic... not unlike Joan Crawford (I don't really know much about Ms. Crawford, but I hear that she was awful, just awful,)... and at some point in the past few days iTunes made a request which inspired a crisis of confidence somewhere in my C-drive. My computer now has all the self-assurance of Bob Wiley and has therefore been tackling each task with baby-steps.
For more information on Bob Wiley and his many hilarious afflictions, watch this:
Yeah. That's pretty much what my computer has been doing the past day and a half.
I don't know boatloads about computers, but I do know a bit. A mega-bit! See? That was a computer joke.
I did some anti-virus stuff and some defragmentation and I deleted a few programs that were eating up valuable memory... pretty basic stuff. However, my computer has been very cautious and is going about these processes at essentially the speed of a Speak & Spell. So rather than settle down and do the work that I actually had hoped to do this evening, I found myself digging through a drawer of old VHS tapes from many, many years ago. The following is an incomplete list of the programming that I or my wife deemed worthy of recording...
several episodes of Space Ghost Coast To Coast,
one episode of Sealab 2021,
one episode of Perfect Strangers,
one episode of WWF Monday Night Raw,
VH1 Behind the Music: Sublime,
the final episode of Seinfeld,
a dozen episodes of The Simpsons,
the Beastie Boys' "Intergallactic" video (three times in a row),
several History Channel programs about experimental WWII aircraft,
commercials for Parker Lewis Can't Lose, Beverly Hills 90210, Lady Stetson perfume,
a Minute Maid commercial with Patrick Ewing spinning a can on his finger,
a Pepsi/Super Nintendo commercial starring Bo Jackson,
a cinematic trailer for Dutch, and the VHS release of Home Alone (a steal at just $24.98),
countless half-episodes of Mystery Science Theater 3000,
and much, much more!
Anyway, my computer has summoned enough courage to allow me these few minutes of blogging enjoyment, which I promptly squandered.
Thank you,
Matt Beers
Sunday, July 31, 2011
Glory Days, part 2
Today I took a shower and emptied the dishwasher. Then I read the newspaper.
I've got to slow down before I hurt myself. I'm not as young as I used to be.
Yesterday was kind of a surprise day. I woke up at 11:00. I didn't wake up at 8:30 and go back to bed, I woke up at 11:00. I must have needed the sleep. Anyway, I got up and decided to skip the late breakfast farce and lunge right into lunch. I had leftover sausage roll and cherry pie. Then I lounged about in my pajamas ALL day watching movies and playing video games. Then, around dinnerish time I got dressed and went out for some sesame chicken and crab rangoon. Then I came home and watched a documentary called Fat, Sick, and Nearly Dead. It was about how the food we eat is killing us. I spent the rest of the day watching movies while working out. This morning I was pleased to discover that I ache all over.
The movies I watched yesterday:
For the record, Master and Commander is one of my all-time favorite movies.
Now, I'm off to have lunch with my friend, the alpaca farmer, Brian Foss.
Thank you,
Matt Beers
I've got to slow down before I hurt myself. I'm not as young as I used to be.
Yesterday was kind of a surprise day. I woke up at 11:00. I didn't wake up at 8:30 and go back to bed, I woke up at 11:00. I must have needed the sleep. Anyway, I got up and decided to skip the late breakfast farce and lunge right into lunch. I had leftover sausage roll and cherry pie. Then I lounged about in my pajamas ALL day watching movies and playing video games. Then, around dinnerish time I got dressed and went out for some sesame chicken and crab rangoon. Then I came home and watched a documentary called Fat, Sick, and Nearly Dead. It was about how the food we eat is killing us. I spent the rest of the day watching movies while working out. This morning I was pleased to discover that I ache all over.
The movies I watched yesterday:
For the record, Master and Commander is one of my all-time favorite movies.
Now, I'm off to have lunch with my friend, the alpaca farmer, Brian Foss.
Thank you,
Matt Beers
Friday, July 29, 2011
I'm pretty sure my actual "glory days" had more police involvement...
Betsy and I have reached a very wonderful time in our marriage. We have agreed mutually that it's totally cool if she takes the kids to Oklahoma for five days to visit her family while I stay home. So, here I am, all alone in this big, empty house. What's a guy to do? Well, I'll tell you...
Matt Re-Lives His Glory Days (Day 1)
It's not all fun and games, you know. I did have to work today. Sort of. This is what I did with the daycare kids...
The plan is that we'll build a whole town (which the daycare kids have named "Betty City,") and then set it all up on a table and add little cars and things like that. What I haven't yet explained to the kids is that Betty City is being built between Angry Mutant Reptile City and Giant Killer Robotville. This won't end well.
As soon as the daycare kids left I rolled in the big-screens. Just two of them. I don't know why I would need all three at once. Besides, there isn't room. I checked.
With no kids to be negatively influenced, I immediately shoved Pulp Fiction into the DVD player and turned it up. I spent the rest of the day playing Lego Star Wars and listening to Quentin Tarantino try to direct himself. It was so much fun that eight o'clock rolled around and I realized that I had forgotten to eat. I rushed right out and bought a delicious sausage roll (with onions and green olives) and a lovely cherry pie. I then sat down and watched an episode of Flight of the Conchords while attempting to eat the entire sausage roll (I failed).
For more information on Pulp Fiction and Flight of the Conchords, see below:
I now sit here writing all of this down as if it would be interesting to anyone but me... and I'm realizing at this very moment that it isn't even interesting to me. But I refuse to be depressed. There's a whole cherry pie on the counter and I don't see anyone else around here that I need to share with.
Thank you,
Matt Beers
Matt Re-Lives His Glory Days (Day 1)
It's not all fun and games, you know. I did have to work today. Sort of. This is what I did with the daycare kids...
The plan is that we'll build a whole town (which the daycare kids have named "Betty City,") and then set it all up on a table and add little cars and things like that. What I haven't yet explained to the kids is that Betty City is being built between Angry Mutant Reptile City and Giant Killer Robotville. This won't end well.
As soon as the daycare kids left I rolled in the big-screens. Just two of them. I don't know why I would need all three at once. Besides, there isn't room. I checked.
With no kids to be negatively influenced, I immediately shoved Pulp Fiction into the DVD player and turned it up. I spent the rest of the day playing Lego Star Wars and listening to Quentin Tarantino try to direct himself. It was so much fun that eight o'clock rolled around and I realized that I had forgotten to eat. I rushed right out and bought a delicious sausage roll (with onions and green olives) and a lovely cherry pie. I then sat down and watched an episode of Flight of the Conchords while attempting to eat the entire sausage roll (I failed).
For more information on Pulp Fiction and Flight of the Conchords, see below:
I now sit here writing all of this down as if it would be interesting to anyone but me... and I'm realizing at this very moment that it isn't even interesting to me. But I refuse to be depressed. There's a whole cherry pie on the counter and I don't see anyone else around here that I need to share with.
Thank you,
Matt Beers
Sunday, June 12, 2011
This is the sound of my brain mumbling.
Bill Murray
Paul Giamatti
Phillip Seymour Hoffman
In order of the number of syllables in their names, these are three actors who have rarely failed to astonish me with their utter awesomeness. The coincidence of their less-than-ideal body types in relation to my own has not been overlooked by me, proven by the fact that I just mentioned it.
On a less than upbeat note, I just watched Stripes again last night and I found it to be rather stupid. Sorry, Mr. Murray, but judging by your performance, you agree. It felt as though they wrote a twenty minute script, filmed it three times in moderately different settings, and then decided to spend the other 90% of the budget on the end, which was terrible.
Why am I bothering to put all of this in a post? What possible relevance could this have? Will there be follow-up posts about other sub-par performances by Messrs Giamatti and Hoffman? Nope.
Maybe.
Parks and Recreation is a pretty funny show. I kinda wanna be Ron Swanson.
Also, I'm pretty bummed 'cause I ran out of Irish Cream tonight in the middle of making a drink. Why do they make those bottle so danged heavy? It throws me, man.
Thank you,
Matt Beers
Paul Giamatti
Phillip Seymour Hoffman
In order of the number of syllables in their names, these are three actors who have rarely failed to astonish me with their utter awesomeness. The coincidence of their less-than-ideal body types in relation to my own has not been overlooked by me, proven by the fact that I just mentioned it.
On a less than upbeat note, I just watched Stripes again last night and I found it to be rather stupid. Sorry, Mr. Murray, but judging by your performance, you agree. It felt as though they wrote a twenty minute script, filmed it three times in moderately different settings, and then decided to spend the other 90% of the budget on the end, which was terrible.
Why am I bothering to put all of this in a post? What possible relevance could this have? Will there be follow-up posts about other sub-par performances by Messrs Giamatti and Hoffman? Nope.
Maybe.
Parks and Recreation is a pretty funny show. I kinda wanna be Ron Swanson.
Also, I'm pretty bummed 'cause I ran out of Irish Cream tonight in the middle of making a drink. Why do they make those bottle so danged heavy? It throws me, man.
Thank you,
Matt Beers
Wednesday, June 8, 2011
We're devils and black sheep, we're really bad eggs. Drink up, me hearties! Yo-ho!
Every summer something awakens inside of me. Sweat glands.
Being a chubby sort of fellow, it doesn't take much in the way of heat and humidity to set off my circulatory system's automatic cooling devices nestled in my rolly-polly places, of which I have many. Before the end of May, it never fails, I'm shunting fashion and propriety to one side in favor of flowy, breathy clothes, regardless of how they look or in what decade they were manufactured. This has resulted in me looking very much like a pirate. I will now share a very poignant quote:
"Be careful what you pretend to be because you are what you pretend to be." - Kurt Vonnegut
Being a chubby sort of fellow, it doesn't take much in the way of heat and humidity to set off my circulatory system's automatic cooling devices nestled in my rolly-polly places, of which I have many. Before the end of May, it never fails, I'm shunting fashion and propriety to one side in favor of flowy, breathy clothes, regardless of how they look or in what decade they were manufactured. This has resulted in me looking very much like a pirate. I will now share a very poignant quote:
"Be careful what you pretend to be because you are what you pretend to be." - Kurt Vonnegut
Tuesday, May 31, 2011
Real Estate Update
Our house has been on the market for exactly eleven (11) days and we have had four (4) showings and zero (0) offers. We have a house all picked out and we're just waiting for the money ($) to roll in from the sale of our house. There. You are now updated.
In other news, it's hot. I hate hot. Well, sometimes hot is okay, but not when you're talking about weather.
I've been a little preoccupied with Bill Murray lately, so, here's some Bill Murray.
Thank you,
Matt Beers
In other news, it's hot. I hate hot. Well, sometimes hot is okay, but not when you're talking about weather.
I've been a little preoccupied with Bill Murray lately, so, here's some Bill Murray.
Thank you,
Matt Beers
Friday, April 22, 2011
There aren't enough hours in the day, but there are about two days too many in the week.
This week has been a little bit preoccupying. I've been so busy doing life that I haven't taken the time to stop and write about it. And I'm still not going to be doing that.
Things on my mind right now:
"So Long, Marianne" by Leonard Cohen,
Top Gear,
and if you don't have that much time, here's a shorter one:
Easter Eggs,
Ferocious Quarterly and all of the things I said I'd do and haven't done yet,
I have a poo that needs to be dealt with,
I haven't eaten breakfast, but I may just wait for lunch,
It's a beautiful, rainy Good Friday and I think we may celebrate as a family by wrapping in blankets and lazing about,
Rob Bell might be the devil, but I seriously doubt it,
My son has decided to write a book which he has called, "Revenge of the Sith,"
George Lucas might sue us over Jack's book,
I slowly and methodically dismantled an old buffet yesterday using a screwdriver and I was comforted by the process,
I then burned the parts of the buffet and was further comforted,
I have some tidying up to do in the garage.
Thank you,
Matt Beers
Things on my mind right now:
"So Long, Marianne" by Leonard Cohen,
Top Gear,
and if you don't have that much time, here's a shorter one:
Easter Eggs,
Ferocious Quarterly and all of the things I said I'd do and haven't done yet,
I have a poo that needs to be dealt with,
I haven't eaten breakfast, but I may just wait for lunch,
It's a beautiful, rainy Good Friday and I think we may celebrate as a family by wrapping in blankets and lazing about,
Rob Bell might be the devil, but I seriously doubt it,
My son has decided to write a book which he has called, "Revenge of the Sith,"
George Lucas might sue us over Jack's book,
I slowly and methodically dismantled an old buffet yesterday using a screwdriver and I was comforted by the process,
I then burned the parts of the buffet and was further comforted,
I have some tidying up to do in the garage.
Thank you,
Matt Beers
Monday, March 21, 2011
Plans. (NOT the very excellent Death Cab For Cutie album.)
I can't believe it's been a week since my last post. I must be lazier than I realize. I've been trying to tie up a few loose ends in my life that have been a constant distraction. By this I mean that I've finally finished watching Battlestar Galactica. Now, with Admiral Adama and President Roslin out of my life, I can focus on what really matters: finally finishing Arrested Development. I'm almost kidding.
The weather lately has been pretty nice. The promise of Spring is one thing, but seeing the first tiny payout of warmth and sunshine has really sparked a change in me. I'm feeling much less grumpy and far more willing to actually move. I've even been lifting weights! Well... lifting weight. Singular. I only have the one.
I've made a decision that I'm going to lose some weight and get in better shape. Lifting my weight is step one. Step two is to cut out soda. Step three is to sew my head back on after I cut it off while in the midst of soda withdrawal. Step four is to... I don't actually have a step four. I doubt I'll get past step two.
In addition to improving my physical health I am putting a lot of focus on my spiritual health. Even though I've been a Christian most of my life, I've never made a habit of reading my Bible. I have a Bible app on my iPod Touch and, as I almost always have it with me, I have no excuse NOT to read.
I'm also planning on spending more time writing. I have tons of story ideas for a series of short stories I've been writing called "In the Shadow of the Standard and Hope," a few of which have been published in the sublime quarterly publication known as Ferocious Quarterly.
Other summer projects include (but are not limited to): planting a tiny 3x3 garden in the backyard for the daycare kids, removing some items (dead plants and large, broken toys) from our backyard, figuring out what to do about the mole problem that seems to have gotten worse over the winter, and setting up a permanent memorial in honor of the gazebo that collapsed last year.
Thank you,
Matt Beers
The weather lately has been pretty nice. The promise of Spring is one thing, but seeing the first tiny payout of warmth and sunshine has really sparked a change in me. I'm feeling much less grumpy and far more willing to actually move. I've even been lifting weights! Well... lifting weight. Singular. I only have the one.
I've made a decision that I'm going to lose some weight and get in better shape. Lifting my weight is step one. Step two is to cut out soda. Step three is to sew my head back on after I cut it off while in the midst of soda withdrawal. Step four is to... I don't actually have a step four. I doubt I'll get past step two.
In addition to improving my physical health I am putting a lot of focus on my spiritual health. Even though I've been a Christian most of my life, I've never made a habit of reading my Bible. I have a Bible app on my iPod Touch and, as I almost always have it with me, I have no excuse NOT to read.
I'm also planning on spending more time writing. I have tons of story ideas for a series of short stories I've been writing called "In the Shadow of the Standard and Hope," a few of which have been published in the sublime quarterly publication known as Ferocious Quarterly.
Other summer projects include (but are not limited to): planting a tiny 3x3 garden in the backyard for the daycare kids, removing some items (dead plants and large, broken toys) from our backyard, figuring out what to do about the mole problem that seems to have gotten worse over the winter, and setting up a permanent memorial in honor of the gazebo that collapsed last year.
Thank you,
Matt Beers
Wednesday, March 2, 2011
No more wet socks!
Annnnnd... we're clear! Alright, my February break is over and now I need to get back to business.
******
How I Spent My February Break by Matt Beers
During February I took a break. I did lots of cool things. I watched a lot of Battlestar Galactica on Netflix. I played Angry Birds on my iPod.
That's pretty much it.
The end.
******
I've been really feeling the season. The end of winter is always so depressing. Everything is gray and slushy. You can't go outside for anything without getting the bottom of your pant legs wet and then you come inside, take off your shoes and your pants get your socks wet. That pretty much sums up how I feel about February. Wet socks.
But it's over now. February is out of our lives for another year and here we are in March, which is pretty much just as bad as February, but I'm looking outside right now and the sun is shining and all the snow has melted and it's hard not to feel upbeat about it all.
******
I've noticed something interesting. I've got Facebook friends living in Alaska. They LOVE the snow. They frickin' better, they're pretty much buried under it for 11.9 months out of the year. I also have Facebook friends living in Florida. One of them was complaining today about the birds. Not really sure why. So what I noticed is this: If you give somebody crap, they have no option but to get excited when you give them extra. When you give somebody sunshine and fluffy, puffy cupcake trees and you pave the streets with Nutella (a new love of mine) they get all crabby because there were birds in the parking lot. There's a lesson to be scraped off of that. Feel free to do so.
******
My son turns seven at the end of the month. We're having a Nerf party for him (my wife's idea, not mine). I'm not as super-excited as one might expect me to be. I'm not really sure why. Maybe it's because my son is getting past the stage where he wants me around when he has friends over. Most likely I'm just worried about all of his weird little friends handling my Nerf guns.
******
Anyway, welcome back.
Matt Beers
******
How I Spent My February Break by Matt Beers
During February I took a break. I did lots of cool things. I watched a lot of Battlestar Galactica on Netflix. I played Angry Birds on my iPod.
That's pretty much it.
The end.
******
I've been really feeling the season. The end of winter is always so depressing. Everything is gray and slushy. You can't go outside for anything without getting the bottom of your pant legs wet and then you come inside, take off your shoes and your pants get your socks wet. That pretty much sums up how I feel about February. Wet socks.
But it's over now. February is out of our lives for another year and here we are in March, which is pretty much just as bad as February, but I'm looking outside right now and the sun is shining and all the snow has melted and it's hard not to feel upbeat about it all.
******
I've noticed something interesting. I've got Facebook friends living in Alaska. They LOVE the snow. They frickin' better, they're pretty much buried under it for 11.9 months out of the year. I also have Facebook friends living in Florida. One of them was complaining today about the birds. Not really sure why. So what I noticed is this: If you give somebody crap, they have no option but to get excited when you give them extra. When you give somebody sunshine and fluffy, puffy cupcake trees and you pave the streets with Nutella (a new love of mine) they get all crabby because there were birds in the parking lot. There's a lesson to be scraped off of that. Feel free to do so.
******
My son turns seven at the end of the month. We're having a Nerf party for him (my wife's idea, not mine). I'm not as super-excited as one might expect me to be. I'm not really sure why. Maybe it's because my son is getting past the stage where he wants me around when he has friends over. Most likely I'm just worried about all of his weird little friends handling my Nerf guns.
******
Anyway, welcome back.
Matt Beers
Friday, February 18, 2011
Is it better than the original? Everything I do is.
The funk has subsided, which is not to say that there is no more Parliament, but I am feeling very much better and far more ready to get up and do things.
The weather was rather lovely today, allowing for a walk and a bit of garage-cleaning, which always perks me up (I try to keep it a mess just in case I need a mood enhancer). Then I went to my regular Thursday night writing group/video game night (depends on if Evan is there or not) where we refilmed Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone. I have twelve minutes of unedited footage that says we did a heck of a job. I've got a lot of editing and special effects to do, but I'll post it as soon as it's finished.
So, today was pretty alright.
Thank you,
Matt Beers
The weather was rather lovely today, allowing for a walk and a bit of garage-cleaning, which always perks me up (I try to keep it a mess just in case I need a mood enhancer). Then I went to my regular Thursday night writing group/video game night (depends on if Evan is there or not) where we refilmed Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone. I have twelve minutes of unedited footage that says we did a heck of a job. I've got a lot of editing and special effects to do, but I'll post it as soon as it's finished.
So, today was pretty alright.
Thank you,
Matt Beers
Thursday, February 17, 2011
My Eeyore post.
I haven't been very imaginative lately. I just wrote about five-hundred words and then realized that it was stupid, so I deleted it, but I didn't want my effort to go unnoticed, so I wrote this. Seriously.
So, what have I been up to? How have I been spending my month off? I honestly don't know. Every day seems to blend in with the next. It's February.
I've recently become aware that I might be suffering from mild depression. I don't sleep well and I'm always tired. I am totally unmotivated and I only want comfort food. When faced with a list of chores, I'll inevitably choose the one that offers the most opportunities to lay on the couch.
The garage is a wreck, I'm completely ignoring certain obligations, I've allowed many relationships to fall apart, I'm not reading, I'm not writing, I'm not moving, I'm not sleeping, I'm eating, but mostly bacon, and I find myself making a big, noisy deal out of every little thing. So, I've got stuff I could be working on, but it seems like all I want to do is play Super Mario 64. It's pretty awesome.
So, there's my mid-break update. There may not be another update until March. To tide you over I have prepared nothing. Sorry. I thought I was gonna do something just then and then I backed out at the last minute.
Thank you,
Matt Beers
So, what have I been up to? How have I been spending my month off? I honestly don't know. Every day seems to blend in with the next. It's February.
I've recently become aware that I might be suffering from mild depression. I don't sleep well and I'm always tired. I am totally unmotivated and I only want comfort food. When faced with a list of chores, I'll inevitably choose the one that offers the most opportunities to lay on the couch.
The garage is a wreck, I'm completely ignoring certain obligations, I've allowed many relationships to fall apart, I'm not reading, I'm not writing, I'm not moving, I'm not sleeping, I'm eating, but mostly bacon, and I find myself making a big, noisy deal out of every little thing. So, I've got stuff I could be working on, but it seems like all I want to do is play Super Mario 64. It's pretty awesome.
So, there's my mid-break update. There may not be another update until March. To tide you over I have prepared nothing. Sorry. I thought I was gonna do something just then and then I backed out at the last minute.
Thank you,
Matt Beers
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
"Life in my p'jams" or "Blizzard Watch '11"
I have not updated my blog in a few days due to a combination of iPod and Battlestar Galactica. The iPod gives me the bare minimum of internet coverage without me having to clear a spot on the kitchen table and dragging out my laptop, and Battlestar Galactica has evil robots. So... yeah.
I'll do a super-quick four-day recap:
It snowed and all over the midwest people are baffled by this strange fluffy white stuff falling from the sky. It hasn't been determined yet whether or not this "snow" has any sinister implications, but it's generally assumed that the world has ended and that toilet paper will be the new, post-apocalyptic currency.
In the Beers' house (still not sure how to plural possessify our last name) we have taken a rather different approach to the collapse of mankind. We have built the ultimate couch fort. I rolled the big-screen into a corner of the living room, turned the couch and loveseat onto their fronts, and padded the floor with couch cushions, pillows, and blankets, making a dark little hidey-hole where we laze about with our iPods, watching movies on Netflix, and generally acting like stoned hippies in the back of a minibus. Except that hippies don't typically have iPods. Or maybe they do now. I don't know any hippies. Can somebody maybe contact me with the correct stereotype?
I went outside to check on the dryer vent and to shovel the driveway. The dryer vent had frozen open, so I took care of that easily enough. The driveway mess was comprised of one inch of powder on top of a layer of ice on top of about four inches of hard-packed snow. I decided that shoveling could wait... until Spring. Instead, I moved two boxes of paper that someone gave us for use in our daycare. Each sheet of paper measures approximately two feet by three feet and each box weighs about a hundred pounds. I'm not exaggerating. I probably should have shoveled instead.
So, that's pretty much it for the past four days. There were some lovely encounters with Earl Grey, some delightful cinnamon rolls, two-dozen very ugly cookies, an amazing pot of white chicken chili, a batch of heart-shaped waffles that turned out rather hilariously, and some cherry cola that didn't last nearly as long as it needed to.
Stay warm and stay safe.
Thank you,
Matt Beers
I'll do a super-quick four-day recap:
It snowed and all over the midwest people are baffled by this strange fluffy white stuff falling from the sky. It hasn't been determined yet whether or not this "snow" has any sinister implications, but it's generally assumed that the world has ended and that toilet paper will be the new, post-apocalyptic currency.
In the Beers' house (still not sure how to plural possessify our last name) we have taken a rather different approach to the collapse of mankind. We have built the ultimate couch fort. I rolled the big-screen into a corner of the living room, turned the couch and loveseat onto their fronts, and padded the floor with couch cushions, pillows, and blankets, making a dark little hidey-hole where we laze about with our iPods, watching movies on Netflix, and generally acting like stoned hippies in the back of a minibus. Except that hippies don't typically have iPods. Or maybe they do now. I don't know any hippies. Can somebody maybe contact me with the correct stereotype?
I went outside to check on the dryer vent and to shovel the driveway. The dryer vent had frozen open, so I took care of that easily enough. The driveway mess was comprised of one inch of powder on top of a layer of ice on top of about four inches of hard-packed snow. I decided that shoveling could wait... until Spring. Instead, I moved two boxes of paper that someone gave us for use in our daycare. Each sheet of paper measures approximately two feet by three feet and each box weighs about a hundred pounds. I'm not exaggerating. I probably should have shoveled instead.
So, that's pretty much it for the past four days. There were some lovely encounters with Earl Grey, some delightful cinnamon rolls, two-dozen very ugly cookies, an amazing pot of white chicken chili, a batch of heart-shaped waffles that turned out rather hilariously, and some cherry cola that didn't last nearly as long as it needed to.
Stay warm and stay safe.
Thank you,
Matt Beers
Wednesday, January 26, 2011
I'm trying to be less popular.
I've just done something I've never done before. I went on a Facebook friend cleaning-spree. This means that I went through my list of Facebook friends and deleted people who I don't talk to ever or don't want to talk to ever.
When I began the project, I had an impressive 507 friends. That number has dropped to a shocking 487. I know. Twenty people. Whoopity-woo. But that's a pretty big deal for me.
Now my friend list is comprised mainly of people I vaguely remember from high-school, family who I don't have the balls to delete, and Serbian teenagers who are just as baffling in their online communication as American teenagers.
(NOTE: If you're reading this and you're my Facebook friend, congratulate yourself. You're part of an exclusive club. If you're reading this and you were once my Facebook friend and you find that you are no longer my Facebook friend, well, that's your own fault. You should have been more interesting. But feel free to continue reading my blog.)
Thank you,
Matt Beers
When I began the project, I had an impressive 507 friends. That number has dropped to a shocking 487. I know. Twenty people. Whoopity-woo. But that's a pretty big deal for me.
Now my friend list is comprised mainly of people I vaguely remember from high-school, family who I don't have the balls to delete, and Serbian teenagers who are just as baffling in their online communication as American teenagers.
(NOTE: If you're reading this and you're my Facebook friend, congratulate yourself. You're part of an exclusive club. If you're reading this and you were once my Facebook friend and you find that you are no longer my Facebook friend, well, that's your own fault. You should have been more interesting. But feel free to continue reading my blog.)
Thank you,
Matt Beers
Monday, January 24, 2011
Large and in the way.
I'm descending into a Winter-funk. I'm not depressed or anything, but I'm tired of my pants always getting wet with slush and snow so I kind of hate leaving the house. I try not to, if I can help it.
This is a current list of places I go on a weekly basis:
Monday: Nowhere
Tuesday: Nowhere
Wednesday: Sometimes Betsy and I go out to eat and then to a bookstore or something, but mostly we don't
Thursday: Evan's house
Friday Nowhere
Saturday: Nowhere
Sunday: Church
Now, looking over the list, you might notice that my obligations leave me plenty of time to stay in my pajamas all day, a perk of which I take full advantage. Even Evan's house has a pretty lax dress code.
We live in a magical society where we can see our friends on a daily basis, eat out whenever we want, and engage in an endless variety of entertainment, all from the comfort of our butts... which stay at home... on the couch.
I scoffed at the idea when I first heard of Netflix. I'm the kind of guy who likes to spend hours perusing the shelves of a video store, looking for that one movie which will perfectly capture my current mood. The idea of posting a list of movies that I'd kinda like to see and then hoping that they send the right one was absurd to me.
But then Netflix added the instant streaming thing and my scoffing went right out the window. Now I can watch pretty much whatever I want whenever I want. I can watch it on my TV. I can watch it on my laptop. I can even watch it on my iPod. Just the other day I was watching Die Hard while sitting on the toilet. I was way done after the first few minutes, but I stayed put 'cause it was just too freakin' cool.
This magical society in which we live has made it possible for me to grow fat and lazy and to blog about it. Ironically, however, my fingers will grow too fat at some point and isolating individual keys on the keyboard will become impossible. Of course, I'll have grown far too lazy for blogging long before that happens. I'm practically there already.
Thank you,
Matt Beers
This is a current list of places I go on a weekly basis:
Monday: Nowhere
Tuesday: Nowhere
Wednesday: Sometimes Betsy and I go out to eat and then to a bookstore or something, but mostly we don't
Thursday: Evan's house
Friday Nowhere
Saturday: Nowhere
Sunday: Church
Now, looking over the list, you might notice that my obligations leave me plenty of time to stay in my pajamas all day, a perk of which I take full advantage. Even Evan's house has a pretty lax dress code.
We live in a magical society where we can see our friends on a daily basis, eat out whenever we want, and engage in an endless variety of entertainment, all from the comfort of our butts... which stay at home... on the couch.
I scoffed at the idea when I first heard of Netflix. I'm the kind of guy who likes to spend hours perusing the shelves of a video store, looking for that one movie which will perfectly capture my current mood. The idea of posting a list of movies that I'd kinda like to see and then hoping that they send the right one was absurd to me.
But then Netflix added the instant streaming thing and my scoffing went right out the window. Now I can watch pretty much whatever I want whenever I want. I can watch it on my TV. I can watch it on my laptop. I can even watch it on my iPod. Just the other day I was watching Die Hard while sitting on the toilet. I was way done after the first few minutes, but I stayed put 'cause it was just too freakin' cool.
This magical society in which we live has made it possible for me to grow fat and lazy and to blog about it. Ironically, however, my fingers will grow too fat at some point and isolating individual keys on the keyboard will become impossible. Of course, I'll have grown far too lazy for blogging long before that happens. I'm practically there already.
Thank you,
Matt Beers
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