Yew Rear's Nesolution

I have decided, as per a New Year's resolution, to make an attempt to procrastinate less. I decided that about an hour ago. On January the 9th.

That's the beauty of vague quantifiers like "make an attempt to" and "less," because no one can say for certain whether or not you're making good on your resolution... unless of course they've been stalking you and know precisely how much procrastination you have done in the past and what actually qualifies, for you as an individual, as "an attempt."

So, I will make an attempt to procrastinate less than I have previously procrastinated. From now on, I will simply not do those things on which I would have previously procrastinated. The following is a list of those things:

change lightbulbs
hang art in our home
put away whatever thing I've left out
call that business about that bill
see a medical professional about a possibly malignant situation
wipe
wash the van
return my unwatched movies to Netflix
send "Thank You" cards for gifts that I never wanted in the first place
watch all of the episodes on my DVR of a show that I only kind of like (we no longer have a DVR, but I'm trying to be relatable)

So, this year, I'm going to officially make an attempt to procrastinate less. There. It's on the books. I can't back out now. Should make for an interesting 2010.

Thank you,
      Matt Beers