I still have mixed feelings about this toy...

Watch this commercial from a thousand years ago and, when you're done, I'd like to talk about it.



I wanted one, plain and simple. I wanted one more than anything, even legs. I had legs, you see, and they weren't that great. I was pretty sure a stuffed Ewok would be WAYYY more fun than legs.

Until...

You know how sometimes nightmares start out as dreams? Well, this one sure did. Before going to bed that night I had finished my Christmas list. At the very tippity-top: Stuffed Ewok. Somewhere below the tippity-top: legs. As I said before, I already had legs, but I thought that another pair might come in handy. Anyway, I made my list and went to bed. That night I dreamed that I got my very own stuffed Wicket W. Warwick, the very bravest of all the Ewoks (but I would have settled for a Princess Kneesa). I was so happy. Wicket and I laughed and romped and smashed AT-STs with logs and got into all sorts of shenanigans. Oh, tra-la-la! And then things went downhill. Fast. You see, Wicket sprouted sharp fangs and tried to eat me.

As soon as I woke the next morning I grabbed my Christmas list and quickly scratched "stuffed Ewok" from it. I also scratched "legs" from the list because, who am I kidding? I didn't use the legs I had. Why would I need another pair?

Thank you,
      Matt Beers